Thumbs would have been really handy....

Getting around with no thumbs makes life a little hard sometimes. Take the weekend for instance. Just cause mum has buggered off doesn't mean that I have to put my life on hold. There was a GAP promo at Morningside. So I endeavoured to go and hang out with my friends and do my bit for GAP. Ok, hitching is all well and good if you have thumbs, and can stand on two legs to display said thumb. I don't, and can't. I resorted to old school tricks and showed a bit of leg, a lot of leg really, I have such long elegant legs and it is not beneath me to use them to get my own way. Normally I am a sensible girl, hitching is not exactly safe, especially for someone as attractive as me! however, after a very rude bus driver failed to believe that I had left my wallet in my other pants ( this may have been because I wasn't wearing any...) I tried to bluff him into thinking that I was the CEO of the company he worked for. This isn't so insane when you consider that it was a Greyhound Bus. I did my best to threaten that he would lose his job if he didn't take me, but he didn't buy it. Probably just as well, there were people on the bus licking the windows and stuff. Please don't feel the need to point out that I lick my own You know what, at least I know where it has been! windows? please people, talk about the "special bus"
It is no mean feat for a greyhound gal to get herself all the way to a promo on her own and yet I still had the good grace to smile and greet people when I got there.

Rocky and I drawing the crowd in

I did my ears trick. The one where they stand up so pointy it makes everyone laugh and try really hard to take a photo of them from the front, at which point I drop on of them, ha ha. There are a few shots of them from behind, but that is just a little tease, amuses me greatly.

I suppose I had better explain a few things before people get all up in arms.
Firstly, Hitching is bad. Greyhounds without leads is bad. Greyhounds hitching without leads is super bad!!
Secondly, I didn't really hitch to a promo, that would involve effort and I am so not into that....
The photo's of me at the promo are actually of Lewis. He is a stunningly handsome boy ( I am not biased thank you very much ) and is so similiar to me that people do a double take. Just goes to show, for every grey there is an equal and opposite grey. I have Lewis, Rocky has Rocky and Patch is special, she has Shani and Wally.

I really want mum to come home so that I can go to promos and see my grey friends........

A Plea Across The Seas

If I try and look cute Mum, will you come home?

12 steps.....

I do not have a drinking problem, really, I don't. It was after 12, I was at a promo. Call it social lubricant, it allows me to be nice to people all day. It is tough to look so pretty and be patted and admired all day. I am not a sitter, I walk or I lie down. I don't like to be stood ON, though I am better at sharing these days - see drinking has positive side effects- like this..... Little people can do what they will with me and I am putty in their hands. I do think that I should have a vest that says "I'm adopted, ask me how" because so many people fall in love with me at promos and want to take me home. I really like mum, I am highly p&%%$&^ that she is in Alaska right now, but I will forgive her.....

Hand guns and dancing boys

Yes, you read right, I have been living it up. By the end of the night it was dancing guns and hand boys!!

This is how I started the night...

Looking very much the part. A few tequila slammers, ok, LOTS of tequila later and it was not so pretty.

Mum is such a party pooper, she would possibly not approve of my fetishes and the like, so I tend not to go all out when she is around. Since she is away I took the opportunity to slip some sedatives in Grandma and Grandpa's tea and PARTAY!!

I would love to tell you all about it, however two things are stopping me.

1./ I don't kiss and tell

2./ I don't remember a whole lot, I do have this photo though, so can only imagine how messy it all was...

Look into my eyes, you are getting sleepy and falling under my spell.

And you all thought that the Jedi mind trick wasnt working. Little does my Mum know that my fall back trick is hypnotism. Look deeply into my eyes......You are getting very sleepy......You will get up off the couch and let me lay on it......You will let me take over the whole bed while you lay on the cold hard floor......You will give me as many treats as I want......You will allow me to have a bowl of ice cream every night after dinner......When I count to three you will wake up refreshed, do all the thing I have said, and remember nothing of this......One.....Two......Three.

I have Down Syndrome....

My tongue is too big for my mouth, so it often hangs out and makes me look really smart.....

When mum is away.....

Mum has abandoned me. She pissed of to bloody Alaska or some such place, and LEFT ME BEHIND!!!! The audacity of it.... after all I do for her. Ok, so I don't do alot, mainly I sleep and eat and make her stress by limping some days. The point is, SHE LEFT ME.

I tried to Jedi mind trick her into staying, I stared at her with glowing eyes and willed her not to go, and still, she packed her bags, dumped me with grandma and grandpa and foofed off.

On the positive side, I get to hang out with Cassie and be spoilt by grandma and grandpa. I am somewhat of a celebrity, the whole neighbourhood loves me. They know when I am coming to stay and all rush out to adore me, as they well should!

I got duped into coming up here, mum conspired with Patch and Rocky's mum to make it seem like we were just "going for a drive"

HA! I am not stupid, they brought my bed and food and toys and when I arrived I gave mum the cold shoulder so she would know that I knew what she was doing. I sat on my bed with my back to her and shunned her.

Then when she left I was all waggy tails and kissy licks because I was getting pats from grandpa, oh, and I stole Cassie's rawhide chew......excellent.

I am going to get up to mischief while mum is away, I don't need her to take me to Dreamworld to have fun.....